A Word of Honesty and Hope

I'm sitting here in Perdido Key, FL where my wife and I have bolted away for a weekend at the beach. This place is a bit of a retreat for us as we shrug off our responsibilities back home, forget about work, and focus on family and relaxation. It's during this time that I typically get some dedicated training in whether it's a long ride or run or both even. Not this weekend, not now. Those weekends are usually followed by a lot of reading by the pool. This weekend I have brought with me the latest addition of Triathlete Magazine to read and some pod casts to listen to, but this weekend, I can't force myself to really get into to either. I think this weekend more than any I've had to really come to terms with what I've known to be inevitable all year. It hasn't really hurt up until this week because it hasn't really seemed a reality until now. I'm having to face the reality that I probably won't be racing this year. It's seems odd to even write that because I know that the season is long and anything is possible, but reality says otherwise.

The truth is that my wife and I have been trying to get pregnant for about a year now. All signs point to there being no real known reason as to why it hasn't happened. It just hasn't. We've met with a specialist who assures us that all of our 'levels" are fine, both mine and hers. My body is doing what it's supposed to as well is Lauren's. That's the mystery. There's nothing that we can't point to and say this is the reason. In speaking to the specialist about my training, we've asked her what she thought about me being on the bike and participating in my typical level of training. She advised that one and a half hours on the bike a week is acceptable as is no more than 5 hours of intense training per week. She said that while all of my levels are in the "good" range, studies have shown that spandex shorts and extensive training can result in a decreased count and viability for men due to heat and endorphin release. Please understand that I'm keeping this as "PG" rated as possible so information will be limited. So given this advice, we've decided to close all doors on what-ifs and error on the side of caution by following the doctor's advice. It wasn't a hard decision to make, but being limited to 5 hours of training per week doesn't exactly put me in a position to be in any type of shape for racing this year. For the most part, I'm just maintaining. I ride for fun rather than for speed. I run to keep the legs fresh rather than to hit a certain goal. The one thing I can do is swim as much as I want.

I am constantly struggling with this though. It kills me to read race reports and know that there's a local race that I'm going to have to miss. I look at my body and know that I'm not in prime condition and that I could do so much more. If you are a triathlete, you know the desire to push and to excel. It absolutely eats you up inside. So much of my enjoyment of this sport comes from the intensity of it all. People who know me keep asking when the next race will be. "I don't know", I tell them, "I haven't put anything on the calendar." I say this all the while knowing that just a 15 minute drive from where I am there's an Olympic distance race going on in Pensacola right now. Next week, the Alabama Gulf Coast HIM race is ten minutes down the road in the opposite direction. I should be there. I should be testing myself against the clock and my peers, but there are bigger things in life and things much more important than racing. It doesn't ease the pain though.

I can't complain too much as this whole procedure has been more taxing on my wife that it will ever be on me. I can't even start to go through the list of things that she's doing to improve our chances. She's changed her diet, given up caffeine, stopped working out, made countless visits to the doctor, read countless books and articles, and basically has given up her own goals for the sake of this one for our family. All I've got to do is give up racing, big wup. She's been the hero in this story. Our desire more than anything is to have a child. This is so much more important than any race or training schedule. I know this, and it's an easy decision to make, but I still struggle with this. I struggle with this daily.

We are a family of faith, or at least we attempt to be. We know that God has taken care of us in every aspect of life. We have no needs, and barely any wants. God will not abandon us in this area either. Faith is easier some days than others. We're not always strong, but we rest in the fact that God is faithful for us in spite of ourselves.

Thanks for reading this post. It's something I've wanted to write for sometime, but haven't been able to bring myself to do so as it's a very personal subject. But this is more of a way for me to come to terms with this and to get a few things off my chest.

Endurance Races in Dixie

This week is a huge week for the South in the world of endurance sports. While sometimes it feels as though the south gets overlooked for major races and events, we have the opportunity this week to showcase our cities to the endurance world. This past weekend in my very own state of Alabama, Olympic hopefuls made the trip to Tuscaloosa for 1 of 3 trials to determine who will represent the U.S. this year in Beijing. The course which closely mimics the course in Beijing for it's elevation changes and weather was a perfect spot for athletes to prove their medal. Matt Reed led the men's group while Julie Ertel brought home the gold in the women's group. Andy Pott's and Hunter Kemper who are both expected to make the team finished second and third to earn points as well.

Secondly, the world of cycling looks to Georgia this week as the Tour de Georgia begins it's trek from Tybee Island to Atlanta. The Tour will see the likes of Team CSC, Slipstream, Astana, High Road and the controversial Rock Racing team. In particular it will be interesting to see how the aging Tyler Hamilton will do in his first year with a pro team after his time off for bad behavior.

As for this endurance athlete, he'll be sitting by his phone waiting for Team High Road to call in case Big George Hincappie goes down and the team needs a replacement. Put me in coach! I'm ready to play!

Update on a Good Week

This week has been work focused if nothing else, but I have stayed true to my second love (Don't worry Lauren, you are my first) and kept my training strong and consistent. The highlight of the week so far has been my swimming. Things are really starting to come together for me in the pool. I don't know if it's the new goggles, the saline pool, or the warmer weather. Cause it sho nuff ain't the athlete. For whatever reason, I'm faster and my endurance has never been better. I knocked out a mile today in 28 minutes which I'm still thumping my chest about. Yeah, yeah, I know it's not that far, but considering my 1.2 miler in my two previous HIMs hovered around 40 minutes, I'm pretty freaking pleased with myself. I will have to give a bit of credit to the Blinkster for his innovative breathing pattern he mentioned. My endurance and speed have shot up considerable since getting more O2 in the system. Check out his blog which is linked on the right to read more about it.

A buddy of mine and I have started throwing around the idea of running an Ultra Relay this fall in the Blue Ridge Mountains. We'd have a team of 6 complete a 208 mile course from Grayson County, VA to Asheville, NC. We'll basically run a 10k segment, rest for 3 or 4 hours, then run another 10K. We'll each run 6 segments all around the 10k distance. Looking over the elevation changes in the route leaves me feeling a bit weak in the knees. It's crazy hilly. I'm mean like mountain goat hilly. Needless to say, if we choose to do it, tri's may have to take a back seat which will absolutely suck. Stay tuned for more on that.

Just for FUN: Let's take a quick test in learning to heed warnings. Don't look at this. You'll thank me.

Retreat to Guntersville State Park

Me lady and I took off to beautiful Lake Guntersville State Park this weekend for a leadership retreat with our church. The plan for the weekend was some good time spent with some peeps from the church and some time spent enjoying to great outdoors. So, of course I took my bike. I've spent a good bit of time riding in the Guntersville area for the AL state sprint championships and some other small local races, but I was looking forward to finding some new places to ride rather than the courses that I knew. I spun around the park for a while before I found this:

Sorry for the quality, but I don't have access to all the cool charts and graphs that grace these bloggy pages. This little ditty starts at 602 feet and climbs to 1134 feet in just over 2 miles. It's absolutely horrendous. I would like to tell you that I spent the better part of the afternoon doing hill repeats on this mutha but alas, I only ventured it once. And that was enough. I did do the back side descent, but that doesn't really count now does it. I exited the park for some sweet lake view rides through the tree covered back roads around the lake. It was a beautiful weekend and a beautiful ride.

Tailwinds.....

Keeping Austin Weird

This week I found myself in Austin, TX for work. It's my first trip to Austin, and I hope it's not my last. I have to thank Tri To Be Funny for her insight on a cool place to run down town. Austin has a lake (that looks like a river) that runs through downtown and has the coolest running trail along beside it. Thursday morning I took off for an early morning run down the trail with intentions on just enjoying the views and being outside. There were tons of people out running which in my eyes makes Austin that much cooler. I headed down a side trail and saw what appeared to be a guy urinating just off the trail. As I got closer, he wasn't urinating at all. He was "having relations" with a girl. Right there on the trail! WTH! I ran by quickly busting out laughing as the young couple quickly gathered up their clothes and sped off in their Firebird. It was 7:00 in the morning by the way. They were doing their best to keep Austin weird indeed.
The rest of the run was not as eventful, but itwas very enjoyable. I ran most of the trail and saw some wonderful sights. Looking to get out again today.
Tail winds....